The older son

Have you heard of the parable of the prodigal son? If no, have a read of the book of Luke in the Bible, chapter 15, verses 11-32.

In summary, a man has 2 sons, the younger asked for his share of inheritance (which to do so at that time & culture was disrespectful as the father was still living). With his inheritance, he went off & squandered his funds on the pleasures of his choice. Soon, those funds came to an end & he found himself in the pits working & living at a farm where the animals that he was caring for had better food than he did. In his depressing state, he reminisced of his life at home & finally got the courage to get up & go home. His father who was at home, constantly waiting for his appearance & keeping a look out for him saw him coming & put together a party to celebrate his return. When his older brother found out about it, he was furious & upset because he had stayed home, been obedient, worked his father’s fields & taken care of the family yet no recognition has ever been given to him. His father’s response to the older son was that “you have always been with me & all that is mine is your’s”.

This is of course a parable or a story with a lesson. Most people seem to see only one part of the lesson, which is from the viewpoint of the prodigal son, where despite his mistakes & wrong choices, he is still loved by his father & is always welcomed home. Then there is also another part which some people pick up which is from the viewpoint of the father who always waits with outstretched arms for the son to return home.

I was curious to look a little further & at a bigger concept, one of the older son & the father. This is the part that gets missed or ignored in most occasion but yet, it still exist & is part of the parable. It has to be there for a reason. How many people have felt like the older son? The one who have done everything right & fulfilled his obligations to his father & family & yet has never been celebrated or acknowledged? How many people have acted like the father who indeed loved both his sons but has forgotten to show that love to the older one who was always there beside him because he was too busy waiting or celebrating the return of the lost one? In the parable, the father does say to the older son that “you have always been beside me & all I have is your’s” but in reality when similar circumstances are portrayed, is that always the case?

Many assumes that the older brother in this story was a portrayal of jealousy but I realised that it isn’t. It is a portrayal that emotions are real, that acknowledgement is something that is required so that the faithful realised that they are valued & loved. The older son did not do all he did & fulfilled his obligations for an acknowledgment from his father… he was merely fulfilling his role… but when acknowledgement, valuation & gratitude is not given (even when the father had intended that all he had will be the inheritance of the older son), frustration & resentment is only a step away.

Even though I have titled this post as the older son, I think in some ways, the lesson I have learnt/discovered today is from the role of the father. We don’t necessarily have to be a father. We could be a leader or a mentor who have several people serving under us or a team who work hard, fulfilling the roles that they are in. They are doing so out of their passion, out of their service for God, out of their good intentions. Sometimes it is not easy to spot them or it is easy to bypass them because they are the ones who are not doing so for a spot in the limelight or to push their way up the chain of command. But they are the ones who crucially need to be acknowledged & valued otherwise when circumstances come, anger, frustration & resentment can only be a step away & the fault is not actually with them because it rises out of their disappointment.

Rest – refresh & rejuvenate for the new year ahead

One word, four alphabets, simple to say, yet difficult to do! This has been my realisation in the last week as I wind down to the end of 2017, which was as some may know, a challenging year for me in all aspects of my life. It was a year that has tested my strength & capacity, physically, emotionally, mentally & spiritually! I am glad to be able to say that I have made it to the end of the year however, in some way, towards the last few weeks, I have only survived. Many have asked as to whether we had holiday plans or how we were spending our time off… in all honesty, all I wanted to do was rest… & so I did. The days between Christmas & New Year went by in a blink as I basically slept, spent time without any worry, drama, issues, challenges, work or anything else. In this time, I have discovered that the few days break had allowed me to rejuvenate & refresh myself to start again for the new year. To those who I have not made time for during this break, I am sorry but I have learnt that I have to sometimes be selfish & make myself a priority so that life can go on without me crumbling. I also have to make my husband & I a priority because we are one & our lives are interdependent as a couple. I am sharing this because I know that 2017 has been tough for many, not just me. If you have the opportunity of a break for the next few days before work recommences for the year, it is not too late to rest… do so & 2018 will be off to a good start for you! 😊❤️